top of page

WHY NOT? / Wall to Wall Nuttiness

Dan Hubig © 2019

By the time you read this the “Wall” controversy may have changed. Trump may have declared a National Emergency in order to detract from the National Emergency that is his Presidency. Or he may deny he meant Mexico will PAY for the wall, but insist that he said, “Mexicans will BUILD the wall!” Since The Racist-in-Chief thinks everyone who lives south of Los Angeles, Denver or Amarillo is a Mexican – that could include all South and Central Americans, all New Mexicans, Texans, and most Southern Californians. Arizonans? That could upset The Boaster–in-Chief’s pal, Sheriff Joe.

Democrats might finance the Wall as a sort of New Deal - WPA operation. Millions of immigrants and out of work Americans would be employed to build the Hideous Separator. The catch being that the same workers would first rebuild and repair our infrastructure - highways, bridges, public buildings, and so forth.

Of course, Congressional leaders would have to convince The Narcissist-in-Chief that the WPA was Reagan’s program, rather than Franklin Roosevelt’s. Or better yet, a Trump idea.

The Wall would still remain a useless, ineffective and repugnant concept. Contrary to what The Bully-in-Chief says, most drugs enter this country by planes and boats. And most terrorists fly here First Class. Besides, any self-respecting cartel or terrorist would tunnel under or blast through any wall in nothing flat. And clever foreigners, like Ted Cruz’s father, will just come in through Canada.

Where we might need a wall is around Florida. Cuban immigrants made Miami the cocaine capitol of The Free World! And talk about violent crime! Did anybody else see the movie SCARFACE? The Wall around Florida could secretly please the Democrats because it would be a Sea Wall. A deterrent to the rising tides of climate change (but don’t mention “climate change” to The Denier-in-Chief).

But Right Wingers love Cuban immigrants. They tend to vote Republican. And Cubans are often linked to one of Republicans’ favorite things-Conspiracy Theories. The Birther-in-Chief himself says Cruz’s Dad was part of the Cuban plot to murder President Kennedy. Of course, that minor transgression did not stop the Hypocrite-in-Chief from endorsing Ted in his Senate race.


James BigBoy Medlin © 2019

James BigBoy Medlin was the sports writer for the original Austin Sun. His column was called "Why Not?"


bottom of page